Why is it so hard for us?
Posted: Sun Dec 22, 2024 8:53 am
Realized Women:
Why do we women have such a hard time reconciling work, family and achieving personal fulfillment? Both in the world of employment, and in the entrepreneurs who come to Simon of Cyrene year after year, we see how this dilemma is so present. It has improved over time, I do not deny it, it was much worse before, but, honestly, there is a long way to go to resolve the fact that a woman's success depends on whether or not she has resolved the family issue.
And I don't want to fall into the classic claim that they don't understand us and australia business email list they make our lives difficult. Women are responsible for the brakes we put on ourselves. We use excuses, we don't believe the story, we don't visualize success and we don't plan our path to personal fulfillment. Because we're not talking about being the most recognized manager or the owner of Coca Cola to succeed. Real success is achieving personal fulfillment for each one, with a balance between personal and work life as a basis.
There are many pressures on women, and much has been written about them. Of these pressures, one of the ones that worries me the most is the pressure associated with caring for a family member. It is taken for granted that, when faced with a newborn baby, a sick person in the family, or an elderly parent who needs care, a woman in the same family must stay at home doing that work. Within all the caregiving tasks, there are some that are more pleasant than others and some that are more solitary than others, but it is not an option to choose. And that generates a series of consequences in the process of personal fulfillment of women. I applaud those who choose wholeheartedly to do these care tasks, whatever they may be. They are contributing to a more connected, more humane, and less individualistic society. I celebrate this, as long as they are consciously deciding to postpone the work progress of their life and accept the consequences without frustration.
But what about those of us who have to take care of a family member in need and who are anxiously watching how time is running out, how we are left out of certain organizational decisions, how we are left out of opportunities to undertake things. Or worse still, what does that large, over-stressed generation of teenagers and elderly parents do? It is difficult to be in a position to undertake things or find work when you have to take a mother to dialysis in the morning and try to look after a daughter in trouble in the afternoon.
What have the new generations brought to the world of work? 15 years ago I started working and I found a rather rigid way of doing things. This was how things had been done for many years in all companies, and who was one, a recent graduate, to change something that was imposed by men and supported by the same women of previous generations. The concept was, either you are successful at work or you are successful with your family, you have to choose. That is why I am grateful to the new generations who managed to change the mentality of those of us who were paralyzed by these concepts. They managed to humanize the work environment, making it clear that personal and work aspects intersect permanently during the day, without lowering performance and achievement of objectives. This is a wonderful advance that must be passed on to the mentality of all women in a profound way. We must change in all of us the idea that, with a plan and discipline, it can be achieved. That we can leave work early to accompany our child in trouble. In order to successfully undertake a career, we cannot just use the free time left to us by the tasks of motherhood. We must organize ourselves differently, ask for help. It is not obvious that we are alone in this, in charge of all family care. There are parents, siblings and children who can and should take charge, but it is we ourselves who must, with humility, open the spaces so that this can be achieved, organize by seeking solutions, forcing a personal and professional balance for everyone. And we have the duty to take charge of our path, of what makes us happy now and what we will do in the next five years to seek personal fulfillment. Because only in this way will the entire society become more humanized, connect and grow together, without leaving anyone behind and taking advantage of the great female talents that are dormant.
Why do we women have such a hard time reconciling work, family and achieving personal fulfillment? Both in the world of employment, and in the entrepreneurs who come to Simon of Cyrene year after year, we see how this dilemma is so present. It has improved over time, I do not deny it, it was much worse before, but, honestly, there is a long way to go to resolve the fact that a woman's success depends on whether or not she has resolved the family issue.
And I don't want to fall into the classic claim that they don't understand us and australia business email list they make our lives difficult. Women are responsible for the brakes we put on ourselves. We use excuses, we don't believe the story, we don't visualize success and we don't plan our path to personal fulfillment. Because we're not talking about being the most recognized manager or the owner of Coca Cola to succeed. Real success is achieving personal fulfillment for each one, with a balance between personal and work life as a basis.
There are many pressures on women, and much has been written about them. Of these pressures, one of the ones that worries me the most is the pressure associated with caring for a family member. It is taken for granted that, when faced with a newborn baby, a sick person in the family, or an elderly parent who needs care, a woman in the same family must stay at home doing that work. Within all the caregiving tasks, there are some that are more pleasant than others and some that are more solitary than others, but it is not an option to choose. And that generates a series of consequences in the process of personal fulfillment of women. I applaud those who choose wholeheartedly to do these care tasks, whatever they may be. They are contributing to a more connected, more humane, and less individualistic society. I celebrate this, as long as they are consciously deciding to postpone the work progress of their life and accept the consequences without frustration.
But what about those of us who have to take care of a family member in need and who are anxiously watching how time is running out, how we are left out of certain organizational decisions, how we are left out of opportunities to undertake things. Or worse still, what does that large, over-stressed generation of teenagers and elderly parents do? It is difficult to be in a position to undertake things or find work when you have to take a mother to dialysis in the morning and try to look after a daughter in trouble in the afternoon.
What have the new generations brought to the world of work? 15 years ago I started working and I found a rather rigid way of doing things. This was how things had been done for many years in all companies, and who was one, a recent graduate, to change something that was imposed by men and supported by the same women of previous generations. The concept was, either you are successful at work or you are successful with your family, you have to choose. That is why I am grateful to the new generations who managed to change the mentality of those of us who were paralyzed by these concepts. They managed to humanize the work environment, making it clear that personal and work aspects intersect permanently during the day, without lowering performance and achievement of objectives. This is a wonderful advance that must be passed on to the mentality of all women in a profound way. We must change in all of us the idea that, with a plan and discipline, it can be achieved. That we can leave work early to accompany our child in trouble. In order to successfully undertake a career, we cannot just use the free time left to us by the tasks of motherhood. We must organize ourselves differently, ask for help. It is not obvious that we are alone in this, in charge of all family care. There are parents, siblings and children who can and should take charge, but it is we ourselves who must, with humility, open the spaces so that this can be achieved, organize by seeking solutions, forcing a personal and professional balance for everyone. And we have the duty to take charge of our path, of what makes us happy now and what we will do in the next five years to seek personal fulfillment. Because only in this way will the entire society become more humanized, connect and grow together, without leaving anyone behind and taking advantage of the great female talents that are dormant.